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NMR ISSUE 48
Astrological
Forecast 48
Be Careful What
you Wish For
Cherished Secret
of Success Resonance
Crone Empowered
Crystal Skull
Luminaria
Daily Prayer
Doing It by the
Book
Editorial 48
Esoteric Symbology
of the Tarot
Frog, Cobra &
Chickadee
Helping Hand or
Magickal Hand
Ikhanten's Doom
Letters 48
Modern Scapegoat
Rituals
North Star Road:
Other Editorial
48
Pagan Catechism
Prayer to the
Goddess
Renewal Through
Release
Samhain Ritual
Temple of the
Goddess grounding Meditation
The Fellowship of
Isis
The Kabalah in
Everyday Use
The Serpent and
the Radio
Timelapse
Wolf Moon
Wrath of the Gods
Luminaria
Articles
Authors
Rituals
Book
Reviews
NMR Issues
NMR
Covers
| Be Careful What You Wish For
By Tim Wayne Prosperity candles can be dangerous. How do I know? Let me relate a story. In 1992, when I still had my long, curly red hair, I was living with my aptly named cat, Velcro, my roommate, Lonnie, and his very pregnant cat, Fae, in a small apartment. One spring evening I decided I needed help finding a job. I burned a green candle (green for prosperity), carved with the proper runes and anointed with some special prosperity and fertility oil. (My teacher suggested fertility oil for seeking the fertile ground of employment opportunities.) I was less than specific with the candle. I figured putting the energy and intent out there was OK. (Benefit of hindsight: I should have just cut the hair) That night, I woke at about 3:45 am because Velcro was sitting on the right side of my head. I wondered why Velcro was on my head. She always slept down near my knees, and always on the left side, never the right. (She didn't like being between the wall and me when I slept, probably because I squished her once or twice in my sleep). I batted the cat away with my hand, and then suddenly, several thoughts occurred to me in quick succession:
The cat was too big to be Velcro.
Since the cat was too big to be Velcro, it must be Fae.
My head is wet.
There is meowing in my bed.
My head is wet.
There is more than one cat meowing in my bed.
My head is wet. Quite wet!
The meowing is quite loud, and seems to be coming from many sources, most of them the high-pitched meowing of kittens. I smell something quite unpleasant.
My entire head is wet.
Fae is pregnant.
Why on Earth is my head so wet? Then, with a flash of recognition, a recoil of horror and a shriek of terror, my poor, sleep-addled brain put it all together. I sat bolt-upright and two kittens fell out of my hair onto the pillow. My long, flowing, curly red hair was no longer flowing, but jelled-down to the side of my head with some sort of balmy, slippery, mushy, translucent, mushy, mushy fluid-like musk-stuff. Fe was on my pillow, looking up at me with wide eyes, with half a kitten sticking out of her ass. My pillow was half-coated with this pinkish, musky, balmy, fluid stuff. So was the right side of my face. I screamed at the top of my lungs, LONNIE! YOUR CAT HAD KITTENS ON MY FACE! My prosperity candle had worked. |
